May 04, 2013

Should Pastors Re-Marry After Divorce? See What Pastor Igbodalo Who Remarried Said

It was a very big issue some years back after Pastor Ituah Ighodalo separated from his first wife and wanted to get married to a beautiful lady. Olufamous.com observed that it was the same issue that made him to leave the Redeemed Christian Church of God, as the church couldn't allow such act.

But is it right or wrong for a man, especially a pastor, to do this? See his position below...

Your wife is stunning. How many years have you been married now?
I got married 2007, so, it is barely six years.

How has married life been to you?
We thank God. It’s been very nice. Very wonderful. I have a very understanding wife. I believe she loves me very much. She’s simple. She’s easy to get along with, and we are very good friends. So, I’m quite happy to be honest.

What attracted you to your wife? How did you know she was the one?
Her simplicity. She’s an attractive person, but then when we got talking, I found her to be simple, down to earth, sincere and willing to accept me for what I was and not what she thought I was. And we got on very well and I had this desire even if I didn’t marry her to look after her; to protect her, to guide her, and to direct her. I had this desire just to take care of her. I just felt that somehow, God had brought her into my life to look after, so I told her that: look even if nothing happens, I will look after you. And I think I’ve kept faithful to that commitment because I do look after her.

You famously left Redeemed shortly after you got married. A lot of people wanted you to end your marriage and remain a Redeemed pastor. Why didn’t you just go with the general consensus and stay in Redeemed? I didn’t think what they desired for me was right. I knew what I was doing when I got married. I received, or I thought I received the support of the church when I got married. And therefore, the solution to that situation was not ending the marriage. There were too many things involved, besides I love my wife, and I was getting on very well with her so why should I end a good thing. So, it’s not denomination, its about serving God, and I knew that I could still serve God in a lot of different capacities and I was determined to continue serving God. So, if you can’t serve God in Jerusalem, you can serve God in Damascus. If you can’t serve God in London, you can serve him in Lagos. So I just kept serving God, and I’m still serving God.

What do you think about a pastor remarrying after your experience?
There are different situations and circumstances clearly the bible says, and I believe that God hates divorce mainly to protect the women, so that men will not just be careless about this business of marriage. So God hates it. Again marriage is a symbol of Christ and the Church, but then there are different circumstances. The bible also says if an unbelieving wife or husband leaves their spouse then the other spouse is free. And more than divorce and separation, God also hates adultery and fornication, and therefore if you are not able to hold yourself, God will rather you marry than continue in adultery and fornication, and just really putting the name of God to shame. So we need to look at every circumstance in context.

So, if a person came to me now and said they wanted to leave their wife or husband, I will really work hard to preserve that marriage. Also, there are some circumstances where there is irretrievable breakdown of the marriage for whatever reason, and if that happens, you have to move to the next stage. Sometimes, God comes with mercy and forgiveness because he understands circumstances. The key is to follow God and obey him, and do what you think he has asked you to do.

You and Pastor Adeboye are related right? It must have been difficult for him to see you go through all that criticism, and ultimately leave Redeemed. You are right. We are related yes. He and my mother come from the same ancestral stock. I cannot say for certain that there is a blood relationship as it were. But my mother and him come from the same ancestral stock. For instance, he taught and lived in my grandmother’s house when he finished university so there’s some blood line there somewhere. That’s the relationship. Well when you see him, you have to ask him about that.

Recently there were rumours about trouble in your marriage on the internet. What do you have to say to clear these rumours, and give some clarity? Yes there were rumours but there is no problem at all in my marriage. It’s just unfortunate that some people decided to go out of their way to create something that was not, but my wife and I are happy. If you go to my house now, you’ll see her there.

A lot of women wanted to marry you when you were single in Christ Church. There are rumours of women basically harassing you, so have they relented now that you are happily married? The harassment didn’t stop ironically. It’s just reduced considerably in that while a lot of people were bold and verbal when I was single ,they are bit more subtle and stylish now, but you can still see and feel. Well, God helped me lets put it that way. Some women are very bold these days. Honestly.

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